Quadrant Queries
{This is the interactive written version of one of the radio shows from Broadcaste System. Ask questions or volunteer to answer them in character. See fillapod for more information or if you'd like to voiceact this or any Homestuck fic.}
{QQ (with color coded text!) is also on the kinkmeme and AO3.}
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Day 5 Query 3: rEdAcTeD
Wrigglers The Both Of You
Fine
What Fresh Hell Waits On The Other End Of This Device
Just push the button, Kanaya.
Hello You Are Now On Air
HeLlO?
OH fiddlesticks.
Karkat I Believe This Call Is For You
kArBro Is ThAt YoU? hAhA, aIn’T pHoNeS jUsT aMaZiNg?
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guess what’s on AO3
That’s right, day 3 in all its technicolor glory. Finally. I also put the kinkmeme titles at the top of each day so you can see what each query is called, and took out some of the extra spacing so it looks nicer. I’m probably going to go back and title the ones on here too.
In other news, the pectinous cube has cloned itself and been very occupied, so for the last several months cognitiveaugurer has been the sole writer on here (basically all of day 4 and some more), probably bits of magikmutant thrown in, and I’ve just been doing some beta (a bit of writing too, whoops I forgot). So big round of applause to her, she’s kept this place running for probably close to a year at this point. (I was writing a bit yesterday and I’m very excited, I missed it.)
Also 94 followers?!
I liked it better when it was 88.Just kidding. Thanks for sticking with us, and thanks for the queries and voice acting offers too. We platonically love every reader very much. -
Day 5 Query 2: Clubbed to Death
…WHAT?
WHAT IS IT, LALONDE, THE CREEPY SMIRK IS FREAKING ME OUT.
So.
SO WHAT?!
You care a lot more about your moirail than you let on.
It’s cute.
IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS AND FRANKLY RUDE TO ASSUME I DON’T CARE.
MY AVERAGE VOCAL DECIBEL COUNT IS NOT AN INDICATOR OF MY ABILITY TO GIVE A trumpet ABOUT OTHERS, YOU KNOW.
Rose Please If You Do Not Stop This Line Of Questioning We Are Going To Receive Another Letter From Karkats “Cousin” And I Do Not Care To Endure Another One Of His Lectures Postal Or Otherwise
He should be ashamed of the number of trees that must die so that his sermons may be delivered unto us.
Cellulose Privilege
TRIGGER WARNING: ARBOREAL SLAUGHTER.
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Day 5 Query 1: Handful of Diamonds
GOOD MORNING, SKAIA UNIVERSITY.
THIS IS KARKAT VANTAS
Kanaya Maryam
And Rose Lalonde here to welcome you to another day of Quadrant Queries.
I would like to take a moment before commencing the show to thank Sollux Captor, our resident tech expert, for his assistance over the past week with our personal project.
AS MUCH AS SAYING THIS GIVES ME INDIGESTION, WE COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT HIM.
Well
Not Without Risk Of Counter Attacks Anyway
ehehe, alway2 happy two help. ii’m 2tiill 2hocked kk made iit, even wiith my help.
OH CRAM IT.
ONCE I HAD HIS SCHEDULE IT WAS SIMPLE ENOUGH TO BEAT HIM TO EVERY PUNCH.
HOW’D YOU LADIES MANAGE?
I’ve been fending off his antics for years now; it was nothing I hadn’t seen before.
Kanaya?
Its Amazing How Quickly Your Species Runs When Given The Right Encouragement
YOU CHASED THEM OFF YOUR DOORSTEP WITH A CHAINSAW.
I Did Just That
You are a goddess among troll and man.
Shall We
LET’S GO.
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More QQ Tomorrow
cA and magik went back to college after a long summer and pectin driving up to visit. Now that life’s back in some sort of scheduled order, going to try to update regularly. Expect a fresh day of QQ tomorrow morning and more to come soon.
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Day 4 Query 6: Handsome Admirerer
*RING RING RING*
Oh My
I Had Forgotten There Was Still A Phone In Here
LALONDE, NO.
STOP.
STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING.
DO NOT ANSWER THAT PHONE.
*RING RING RING*
The phone is a legitimate mechanism to submit a query through.
NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENS WHEN WE ANSWER THE PHONE!
DID YOU FORGET THE FACULTY SPONSOR? TIME TRAVEL GUY?
I… I actually had forgotten Time Travel Guy.
Whatever Happened To Him
Aradia caught wind of what had been happening before we were… forced off the air, and took it upon herself to take care of his situation personally.
*RING RING RING*
It seems she lacked faith in Dave’s… not ability to help him, but more his dedication to the task.
WOW. SHE WAS COMPLETELY RIGHT.
Well Good For Her Then
I could explain in excruciating detail how she pulled him from his time loop, it really was a remarkable tale.
NO!
I NEVER WANT TO THINK ABOUT TIME TRAVEL AGAIN!
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Day 4 Query 5: Seeing Spades
Oh Dont Be Such A Killjoy Rose
YOU CAN’T HELP THAT YOU AND THE REST OF YOUR SPECIES ARE JUST NATURALLY IMPAIRED WHEN IT COMES T – OW, can town, WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!
I wonder.
SO DO I! YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED THE VARIOUS VOCAL INFLECTIONS I APPLIED WHEN MAKING THAT STATEMENT THAT INDICATED IT WAS A stupid QUESTION!
MAYBE YOU’D LIKE TO ANSWER IT?
I think you already know.
ALL YOU ARE DOING IS PROVING MY POINT. WE’VE BEEN DOING THIS ASHEN THING FOR, WHAT, TWO MONTHS NOW? AND HERE YOU ARE SCRE – DAMNIT, STOP THAT!
No.
kk, ju2t 2hut the hell up.
WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN THE PALE, BLONDE FURY THAT I HAVE APPARENTLY AWAKENED, AND WHY IT WON’T STOP SWATTING ME LIKE A WRIGGLER?
kn, 2hould ii 2tep iin or 2omethiing?
Karkat We May Need To Have A Platonic Discussion After The Show But For Now It Really Would Be Your Best Move To Drop The Subject
WHATEVER. I GIVE UP!
PLEASE, NO NEED TO TROUBLE YOURSELVES, LET ME LEAD THE WAY TO DEALING WITH SOME OTHER ASSHOLE’S PROBLEMS.
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Day 4 Query 4: Caught in the Middle
With the luck we’ve had in the past, I’m quite impressed with how smoothly today has gone, all things considered.
A simple moirallegiance query, only one tedious joke query, corrected a misguided soul…
We Managed To Only Slightly Ruin The Announcements And Karkat Only Threatened To Walk Out Once
Yes, it has been such a good day.
AND NOW YOU’VE BOTH JINXED IT.
WAY TO GO LADIES, I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE WHAT KIND OF HELL YOU BRING DOWN UPON US WITH YOUR THOUGHTLESS REMINISCING OF THE PAST THIRTY MINUTES.
WHERE’S THE NEXT DAMN LETTER?
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Advertisement Interlude 4: Cultural Festival
Glad You Decided To Stay Karkat
YEAH. YEAH, YELLING FEELS GOOD.
HELPS ME FORGET I’M WASTING MY SUMMER IN A CLASSROOM AGAIN.
I Am Personally Finding My Summer Classes Quite Enjoyable
IMAGINE THAT! YOU SPEND ALL DAY DESIGNING DRESSES, REALLY TOUGH AND STRESSFUL thread.
They Are Not All Dresses And I Would Like To See Your Attempts At Fashion Design Before You Speak Like That
PEOPLE DON’T NEED ANYTHING MORE THAN A T-SHIRT AND SOME JEANS. ALL THOSE EXTRA FRILLS AND ZIPPERS ARE A WASTE OF TIME.
I Rest My Case
WHATEVER. WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE FOR THE SUMMER, LALONDE? ENGORGING YOUR RESUME WITH AS MANY EXTRA CLASSES AS POSSIBLE?
Yes.
OH.
WELL, OK THEN.
I think that’s enough banter for now.
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Day 4 Query 3: Friends and Speciests
Perhaps karma will be in your favor.
AND THE NEXT QUERY WILL BE A BURSTING PUSTULE OF IDIOCY?
I CAN ONLY tingle HOPE.
RIGHT.
LET’S SEE IF I CAN’T GET SOME FRESH MEAT TO TEAR INTO.
Help me convince my friend to stop dating this girl in his class. They’re completely unsuitable for each other, but when I told my friend this he accused me of being speciest. Can you believe that? We’ve been friends since kindergarten and he goes and accuses me of something like that! I think the girl’s been trying to turn him against me.
Friendgence
Wait
Before Karkat Says Anything
I Will Agree That “Speciest” Is A Presumptuous And Grammatically Questionable Accusation On Your Friends Part
KANAYA’S RIGHT, THAT’S PRETTY UNCALLED FOR.
WHAT HE SHOULD BE CALLING YOU IS A DIC-
